Today is Madeleine Elise Suarez's 7th birthday. She lives in Houston, TX and I live in Prior Lake, MN. Doesn't make for a way to have a big brithday party. I miss her every day because I can't kiss and hug her the way I can my other grandkids who live here.
Leanna is very good about sending pictures of Maddie almost every week now which does help but I still cry. I'm hoping we can work it out to have her spend a couple of weeks here in MN this summer, but we'll have to see. It's always about the money.
To Maddie - I want to tell you to have a very happy birthday even though Nonna and Poppa are not there to celebrate with you,. Please know we love you very much. Ask Mommy and Daddy to give you some big hugs and kisses from us. Presents are coming from Nonna and Poppa and GG too!
Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Maddie, happy birthday to you!! Don't forget to make a wish when you blow out the candles!
Friday, May 29, 2009
Monday, May 25, 2009
MEMORIAL DAY
Today we celebrated Memorial Day the same way we have for the last 8 years, arriving at Acacia Cemetary to observe the laying of the wreaths, the playing of Taps, the 21 gun salute, the Living Cross done by the Jobs Daughters and the trip down the hill to visit our beloved Chloe. There were a few exceptions this year. Bruce and I arrived 15 minutes late for "muster" at 9:30 AM as Bruce was not feeling well at all, Jenny and John thought the ceremony started at 10:30 AM and got there right at 10, the rest of the Karline family arrived, I sat by myself while the rest of the group sat in the sun (with the occasional visit by Colby and Max to sit in my lap and cuddle), visiting with our many friends from the Masonic Orders, losing Bruce, finding Bruce and finally arriving at the bottom of the hill to put flowers from a friend's wedding at Chloe's gravesite.
The ceremony and speeches today honored the men and women in uniform both past and present. I thought of my son-in-law headed to Afghanistan and how I didn't want him to have to go. But, at the same time extremely proud of him for being willing to lay his life on the line to help us keep the freedoms we have. I thought of Jenny and how strong she will need to be during the coming months and I thought of my grandchildren who will be without their father for 12 long months. Yes, there were a few exceptions today.
Many things were different as I didn't feel the need to stay as long this time. Maybe it was because Bruce was ill and I wanted to get him home. Maybe it was just time to do what I had come to do and move on. Maybe it's because Chloe is in my heart all the time now and I don't need to see the grave marker as much or . . . maybe, just maybe I prefer to sit with Chloe by myself and talk to her. To tell her how much she is needed to watch over her family, her mommy needs to know she has a guardian angel, her daddy needs her to protect him while he is in Afghanistan, her brothers and sister need her to help them be good and helpful while daddy is away and to tell her how much I miss her.
After leaving the cemetary and getting Bruce home, I went out to Jenny's to have lunch with their family and John's parents. John was leaving later in the afternoon to return to Camp Ripley for another 3 weeks of training. While Jenny and I made mints for the deployment ceremony in Chisholm, I watched as John interacted with each of his children. Jenny excused herself for have a few moments of private time as she said her goodbyes. After that, John came to say goodbye, hugs his kids, allow me to hug him and tell him to take care of himself and we would help take care of his family. I watched when Jenny returned from walking John to his car. I knew the tears were there and she was being brave, even asking for her own pity party which, of course, I granted.
I think it takes a pretty strong woman to have to say goodbye several times over until the one that means I won't see you for a year. I never thought much about the military until John came into our lives, but this Memorial Day I thought about it even more. Yes, this Memorial Day was different but then again, aren't they all?
The ceremony and speeches today honored the men and women in uniform both past and present. I thought of my son-in-law headed to Afghanistan and how I didn't want him to have to go. But, at the same time extremely proud of him for being willing to lay his life on the line to help us keep the freedoms we have. I thought of Jenny and how strong she will need to be during the coming months and I thought of my grandchildren who will be without their father for 12 long months. Yes, there were a few exceptions today.
Many things were different as I didn't feel the need to stay as long this time. Maybe it was because Bruce was ill and I wanted to get him home. Maybe it was just time to do what I had come to do and move on. Maybe it's because Chloe is in my heart all the time now and I don't need to see the grave marker as much or . . . maybe, just maybe I prefer to sit with Chloe by myself and talk to her. To tell her how much she is needed to watch over her family, her mommy needs to know she has a guardian angel, her daddy needs her to protect him while he is in Afghanistan, her brothers and sister need her to help them be good and helpful while daddy is away and to tell her how much I miss her.
After leaving the cemetary and getting Bruce home, I went out to Jenny's to have lunch with their family and John's parents. John was leaving later in the afternoon to return to Camp Ripley for another 3 weeks of training. While Jenny and I made mints for the deployment ceremony in Chisholm, I watched as John interacted with each of his children. Jenny excused herself for have a few moments of private time as she said her goodbyes. After that, John came to say goodbye, hugs his kids, allow me to hug him and tell him to take care of himself and we would help take care of his family. I watched when Jenny returned from walking John to his car. I knew the tears were there and she was being brave, even asking for her own pity party which, of course, I granted.
I think it takes a pretty strong woman to have to say goodbye several times over until the one that means I won't see you for a year. I never thought much about the military until John came into our lives, but this Memorial Day I thought about it even more. Yes, this Memorial Day was different but then again, aren't they all?
Saturday, May 16, 2009
GRANDKIDS
Today I had the pleasure of spending some time with my grandkids while their mom and I did our grocery shopping. When the girls were little, we rarely took them to the grocery store. I usually did the shopping and my husband watched the girls. Jenny doesn't have the luxury now with John at Camp Ripley. I knew she had to do her shopping so I called and asked if she wanted some company and use the "divide and conquer" technique to get through it unscathed.
It was funny to watch the dynamics of the kids. One didn't want to be where his brother was, one wanted to be with me and then mom and then me and the mom... well, you get the picture. I had the boys help get things off of the shelves and they seemed to enjoy helping me. Sarah on the other seemed to be not listening at all and just went about doing what she wanted to do.
Max said he was thirsty so I told him he could have one of the bottles of strawberry water I was buying. There were four in the pack so I knew the checkout would be fine. he kept asking me if I had paid for it yet. I told him no but that I would be when we checked out. Well, he decided he didn't want to drink it if it wasn't paid for. Cute huh?
After I had checked out and was waiting for Jenny, Max was in the way, Colby was helping put the bags in Jen's cart and I noticed Sarah with her hands in her pockets. I knelt down to see what she was "hiding". In one pocket was some bubble gum and the other had a chapstick. Her little bottom lip was quivering as I scolded her for taking something that was not hers. I told her I never wanted to see her take anything again or Nana was going to be very mad at her. Jenny watched the scene while checking out and later said she stayed out of it since she hadn't seen what was going on. I hope Sarah got the message and won't try that stunt again.
Then we were off to White Castle for lunch. We ate leisurely and talked between the two tables we sat at. Kids at one, Mom and Nana at the other. All was well until Sarah decided to get down from the high stool she was perched on. As she jumped down her toe caught on the rung of the chair and she fell right on her knees. She cried and Mom gave her a big hug and carried her out to the car. I said my goodbyes and waved as they drove away.
Even though there were some rough spots today, I enjoy being with my grandkids. I love their different personalities, how they interact with others and themselves and how they give me hugs unconditionally as do I in turn. They are one of the greatest gifts in life I have been given (along with a fantastic husband, two smart, talented daughters and two son-in-laws who love my daughters). Until next time . . .
It was funny to watch the dynamics of the kids. One didn't want to be where his brother was, one wanted to be with me and then mom and then me and the mom... well, you get the picture. I had the boys help get things off of the shelves and they seemed to enjoy helping me. Sarah on the other seemed to be not listening at all and just went about doing what she wanted to do.
Max said he was thirsty so I told him he could have one of the bottles of strawberry water I was buying. There were four in the pack so I knew the checkout would be fine. he kept asking me if I had paid for it yet. I told him no but that I would be when we checked out. Well, he decided he didn't want to drink it if it wasn't paid for. Cute huh?
After I had checked out and was waiting for Jenny, Max was in the way, Colby was helping put the bags in Jen's cart and I noticed Sarah with her hands in her pockets. I knelt down to see what she was "hiding". In one pocket was some bubble gum and the other had a chapstick. Her little bottom lip was quivering as I scolded her for taking something that was not hers. I told her I never wanted to see her take anything again or Nana was going to be very mad at her. Jenny watched the scene while checking out and later said she stayed out of it since she hadn't seen what was going on. I hope Sarah got the message and won't try that stunt again.
Then we were off to White Castle for lunch. We ate leisurely and talked between the two tables we sat at. Kids at one, Mom and Nana at the other. All was well until Sarah decided to get down from the high stool she was perched on. As she jumped down her toe caught on the rung of the chair and she fell right on her knees. She cried and Mom gave her a big hug and carried her out to the car. I said my goodbyes and waved as they drove away.
Even though there were some rough spots today, I enjoy being with my grandkids. I love their different personalities, how they interact with others and themselves and how they give me hugs unconditionally as do I in turn. They are one of the greatest gifts in life I have been given (along with a fantastic husband, two smart, talented daughters and two son-in-laws who love my daughters). Until next time . . .
Friday, May 15, 2009
MISSING FAMILY
Last night I had the opportunity to watch three of my grandchildren while mom went to Bunco Night with her neighbors. They were good for me and did what I asked. But, being with them makes me miss my other daughter's family.
Leanna along with her husband Stacy and their children Madeleine and Xavier live in Houston, Texas. Maddie is almost 7 years old and Xay will be 4 in August. They are great kids who live life and play hard. When I have the chance to visit with them, we have so much fun and I love to hear "Nana, Nana's here!" Of course, I love hearing it here in Minnesota as well but I don't get to hear Maddie and Xay voices that often.
Leanna sends me pictures every once and a while. More often now that she has a iphone. The pictures are usually of the kids doing something cute from sitting eating a hot dog to swimming in Grandma Romie's pool to dancing to the music. Maddie will usually stop what she is doing a "pose" while Xay just keeps right on with what he is doing.
Leanna and Stacy take the kids to lots of different parks, museums and the rodeo. They go to the movies once in a while but are now focused on looking for a new apartment. After 8 months of living with Grandma Romie, it's time to move out. Leanna has found a job she loves (timing for a job in MN came just two weeks too late) and Stacy is up for a promotion (keep your fingers crossed). Today I think Stacy is going to call around looking for a 2 bedroom place they can call home. One good thing will come out of this, they have to come to MN to get their stuff out of storage so we will get to see them. Of course, that means we have to give back the big flat screen TV we have in our family room. they didn't want to put it in storage we agreed to have it in our family room to use. Guess we'll just have to buy ourselves our own.
It is so hard to have family live so far away. It's too far for a car ride and too expensive to jump on a plane when you want to see them. Leanna is my second child and having her so far away sometimes hurts so much I just sit down and cry. Those times usually come on the heels of seeing a cute picture of the kids, hearing a funny story or listening to Leanna and her issues and not being there to comfort her. You watch this tiny baby become a toddler, go to school, go to college, get jobs, fall in love, get married ...... You don't stop being a "mom". They will always be your child and you hurt when they hurt and you're happy when they're are happy.
If Leanna and Stacy get a chance to read this, I hope they know how much I love them, how much I miss them and how much I wish them only happiness. In my heart I know you must live your life your way, but that doesn't mean I still won't always keep a glimmer of hope you will find your way back to MN at some point in time to live and work.
Missing family sucks but you grin and bear it and know that you have a warm place to visit in the winter!
Leanna along with her husband Stacy and their children Madeleine and Xavier live in Houston, Texas. Maddie is almost 7 years old and Xay will be 4 in August. They are great kids who live life and play hard. When I have the chance to visit with them, we have so much fun and I love to hear "Nana, Nana's here!" Of course, I love hearing it here in Minnesota as well but I don't get to hear Maddie and Xay voices that often.
Leanna sends me pictures every once and a while. More often now that she has a iphone. The pictures are usually of the kids doing something cute from sitting eating a hot dog to swimming in Grandma Romie's pool to dancing to the music. Maddie will usually stop what she is doing a "pose" while Xay just keeps right on with what he is doing.
Leanna and Stacy take the kids to lots of different parks, museums and the rodeo. They go to the movies once in a while but are now focused on looking for a new apartment. After 8 months of living with Grandma Romie, it's time to move out. Leanna has found a job she loves (timing for a job in MN came just two weeks too late) and Stacy is up for a promotion (keep your fingers crossed). Today I think Stacy is going to call around looking for a 2 bedroom place they can call home. One good thing will come out of this, they have to come to MN to get their stuff out of storage so we will get to see them. Of course, that means we have to give back the big flat screen TV we have in our family room. they didn't want to put it in storage we agreed to have it in our family room to use. Guess we'll just have to buy ourselves our own.
It is so hard to have family live so far away. It's too far for a car ride and too expensive to jump on a plane when you want to see them. Leanna is my second child and having her so far away sometimes hurts so much I just sit down and cry. Those times usually come on the heels of seeing a cute picture of the kids, hearing a funny story or listening to Leanna and her issues and not being there to comfort her. You watch this tiny baby become a toddler, go to school, go to college, get jobs, fall in love, get married ...... You don't stop being a "mom". They will always be your child and you hurt when they hurt and you're happy when they're are happy.
If Leanna and Stacy get a chance to read this, I hope they know how much I love them, how much I miss them and how much I wish them only happiness. In my heart I know you must live your life your way, but that doesn't mean I still won't always keep a glimmer of hope you will find your way back to MN at some point in time to live and work.
Missing family sucks but you grin and bear it and know that you have a warm place to visit in the winter!
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
THE COUNT DOWN BEGINS
Today is Day Two of my son-in-law John's second deployment. He is currently at Camp Ripley in preparation for his tour of duty in Afghanistan. I won't always see the day to day living my daughter Jenny and her children go through but I will see part of it. I know this is a struggle for her. To work, mother three children, take care of the house and have some kind of social life to maintain her sanity. These are the days a mother has a hard time watching her adult children go through life. You want so much to make it "all better" for them just like when they were little but you know you can't.
For my part, I'm hoping to spend some quality time with my grandson, Max. He loves to swim and since that is one of my passions as well, we will be hitting the pools a lot this summer. On other days it will be Colby who gets the attention. He loves to work with Legos and play Nintendo DS. I'm sure he can teach me a lot about both of them. Still other days will be spent with granddaughter Sarah. She loves to dress up, go shopping and have lunch. You can kind of see where we will be going with that - can anyone say MOA?
It is my hope I can get my husband to spend some time with the grandkids as well so I can take Jenny out once and a while. To have just girl talk, maybe have a quiet lunch or dinner or take in a movie. I will value this time as it is very rare. I wish there was more, but life has a way of getting in the way.
To John I just want to say - I don't always say it but I want you to know - I am very proud of you. You are a wonderful father, an attentive husband and a good soldier. I have a picture of you in uniform with Jenny at Amy's wedding sitting on my desk. It is there to remind me to pray for your safety and that of the men who serve with you. Please take care, come home in one piece and write when you can.
For my part, I'm hoping to spend some quality time with my grandson, Max. He loves to swim and since that is one of my passions as well, we will be hitting the pools a lot this summer. On other days it will be Colby who gets the attention. He loves to work with Legos and play Nintendo DS. I'm sure he can teach me a lot about both of them. Still other days will be spent with granddaughter Sarah. She loves to dress up, go shopping and have lunch. You can kind of see where we will be going with that - can anyone say MOA?
It is my hope I can get my husband to spend some time with the grandkids as well so I can take Jenny out once and a while. To have just girl talk, maybe have a quiet lunch or dinner or take in a movie. I will value this time as it is very rare. I wish there was more, but life has a way of getting in the way.
To John I just want to say - I don't always say it but I want you to know - I am very proud of you. You are a wonderful father, an attentive husband and a good soldier. I have a picture of you in uniform with Jenny at Amy's wedding sitting on my desk. It is there to remind me to pray for your safety and that of the men who serve with you. Please take care, come home in one piece and write when you can.
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